HOW DO WE FORGIVE OUR FATHERS?

Missing my father today just as I missed him while trying to grow up and become a man without him. The following poem is to me deep, powerful and truthful and conveys the uncertain dance between all fathers and their sons. It is from a wonderful film called "Smoke Signals"; author os unknown to me.

             

HOW DO WE FORGIVE OUR FATHERS?

…maybe in a dream,

Do we forgive our fathers for leaving us too often

Or forever

When we were little,

Maybe for scaring us with unexpected rage

Or making us nervous

Because there never seemed to be any rage there at all.

Do we forgive our fathers for marrying

Or not marrying our mothers,

For divorcing

Or not divorcing our mothers.

And shall we forgive them

For their excesses of warmth or coldness,

Shall we forgive them for pushing

Or leaning,

For shutting doors

For speaking through walls,

Or never speaking

Or never being silent.

Do we forgive our fathers

In our age

Or in theirs,

Or in their deaths.

Saying it to them

Or not saying it.

If we forgive our fathers

What is left…