#47
xmas morning.
holds no connection to spirit for me but my connection to spirit has been lacking lately as it is. although i know that the force of love is pulling me towards its source always, in the midst of my fear and resistance, i can feel despairing and alone.
what keeps me from giving up?
the love,
the undying love i have for myself keeps me in the ring.
ironic that it is my self love that refuses to settle for an outcome
anything other than the experience of self love and complete acceptance.
the appearance of loves absence is illusionary.
but the belief in it’s absence
creates an experience of sadness
and loneliness for me-
for this i can always take note and apologize,
make amends to myself for
forgetting to be compassionate with myself.
i am the first person on my list
that i must love completely
if i am to love you.
when i judge and am unhappy
with myself
for any reason,
when i measure and reject my current presence
i reject all the world and
each and every person in it.
as within so without
at all times.
i am an imperfect man
with a good heart
and a sincere desire to become
a love spot,
a safe place to be for my self and others
in an unsafe and often frightening world.
what makes me safe is my understanding
that the force that shapes
circumstances in this world
has as its highest intention
the goal of growing me,
of growing us
to the realization that we are-each of us
simply a shard of God itself,
simply a crystal of light from all that is light,
just a chip off the old block of Love
that creates everything in the universe
that is
the universe itself.
amen.
